Baltimore Annapolis Hash House Harriers

What: YOGAttabekiddingme trail*

What?: Wear your best/worst yoga pants or zen gear.

Who: BBD…Good Times & Double-D Ass

When: 3 Pee m

Where: 166 Defense Highway (Conte Building). Annapolis, MD

D’Erections: look that shit up on the internet. Park it in the rear (of the building). Drink alcohol. Forget this ever happened.

Cost: Six cash money dollars.

Who: All are welcome (runners, walkers, virgins, dogs, cats, gerbils, ponies, jack, smaller humans).

On After: dunno. Some place by the mall? Maybe tilted kilt or green turtle.

BBD’s cell: 585-748-7515

Pre-trail story-time: A long long time ago, in the near by Land of Mary, BBD signed up to hare. As the date got closer, she decided to lay trail near Annapolis, but not downtown (and thanks to dickbutt, can no longer use her lawn for hash space). She found some green space on google earth near Annapolis, checked it out, and decided to go with it.

Then, on the Wednesday a week and a half before this trail was to get laid, she came (home) after a very stressful work day, went to yoga class, and then decided to take a full ambien at 7:30pm hoping she could get a decent night’s rest. She chased that beautiful little miracle sleep pill with a refreshing can of alcoholic sparkling grapefruit malt beverage (and it was delicious) and planning on going to bed after watched an episode of New Girl. She woke up for working the next morning feeling refreshed and ready for the day.

BBD arrived at work Thursday morning and started her morning ritual of not doing anything for the first hour or so, instead choosing to catch up on Facebook, playing Fishdom, and reading (taking quizzes) on that fake news site BuzzFeed. To her joy she has three new Facebook notifications, oh goodie!

Scrolling through the notifications, and then other areas of her phone, she learned that her alternate persona, “ambien blackout BBD” did the following things:

1) that she was “maybe” attending a birthday party next Friday, even though she will be on a plane at that time (time zones are hard).

2) She posted in this birthday party invite, misspelling the word t-shirts in an attempt to refer to Chix’s infamous storm trooper pose, peaking Amazon’s curiosity as to what “tshits” are.

3) She had regoed for green dress as “beer & a bag of GLITTERY BROWN dildos…good times”. She also hails from the “SMMUTy” kennel, not SMUTTy. And she did not even spell her nerd last name correctly on the rego (Ponyboy, can you please fix all this shit?).

4) She had posted that she was haring a yoga trail with Double-D Ass. Putting together the pieces, Candy Cornhole posted an article about “beeryoga.” BBD then texted Double-D Ass asking her to co-hare since she teaches yoga. BBD reposted the link, stating that she and Double-D would be haring a beeryoga trail on the 29th.

5) Most excitingly, she wrote that trail will include “fireball yoga” whatever that means.

Can’t wait to find out though!

So put on your best yoga pants, breakout your fanciest upward or downward facing dogs (really, any doggie style will do as we all saw from the photo of trail on the 22nd) because BBD blacked out on Ambien (and a little bit of alcohol) and decided to do a yoga hash!

*No real yoga will likely be harmed in the running of this trail.