Hash Trash#1193: Evidence; Pictorial and Otherwise
spoiler alert: there was a naming, and she got it the old fashioned way: by doing something ridiculous right before our very eyes.
a mob of desperate souls made their way to somewhere near the IKEA in college park where there were plenty of stickers. lets see who i can remember… hash hab and maybe hash flash pump n dump, because of course no one can forget her, silence of the clams, who puts up with her shit, electric muff chuckler who went on to glory that day as our sexy sexy beer bitch… Cleanup…. Mayorall Fixation, who actually did the real no kidding trail instead of zenning around with a google map….. a first for him…. Nugget .. Patches…. Schmeg…. ECDC… Grand Mattress, who took a dump on trail then used her scrunchy to freshen up….. yes, really…. Just Krysten, who may one day seriously challenge PnD as most likely to do something you need a picture of… well maybe after ATM with his tight little white ass and need for attention ……. Fossil… ZZB3… dr strangelove… $5I…betwixt 15 and 20 wankers which is alot for a ridiculous day like that.
So our very own actual preacherman Running Bhare recruited Fey Ley to be his beer bitch for the 2 countem 2 beerchecks, and he briefed us on his clever idea to use sawdust and mulch for trail marking because it might stand out against the snow, while blending perfectly with wood and leaves. Note to hares: don’t take Running Bhares advice even if he’s set more trails than all of us combined. Well to be honest it was not like he was pretending to do us any favors with his choice of ….everything. you paid your 6 bucks wanker.
Promptness not seeming to be popular, about 8 people rolled in after the appointed time of 3pm for our services. tut tut. then we prayed to our beergod in the words of our lord natty boh and it was On On! Fey realized about this time she had no idea where she was going for beer check so had to call RB while he was haring, to ask where she she’d go. Pooper Trooper from DCH4 commented he was looking forward to something not as extreme as RB’s last trail. ha ha ha. fool. Meanwhile we dived into the flesh ripping stickers, a total trickfuck of the pack with an out and back tunnel crossing and then some streams thrown in for good measure, brisk when its in the 30’s outside. a beer check. some industrial parking lots. a GNC where gaelick, ATM, others posed for posterity. very cute. Another beer check. Nugget and Patches were pleased to find some decomposing organic matter to stick their noses in. Schmeg joined them. Down some bike trail with an eagle trail off into some hideous looking impassable stuff. Zero hashers opted for the eagle trail, which is saying something, possibly that we are learning. to the On In. A nice trail.
Now for a comfy little circle, plenty of abandoned parking lot around. Instead, imagine some nasty sticker shiggy in a mudhole you would avoid on trail; this is where Running bhare had a roaring fire going in the portable firepit he brought. We couldn’t even fit around the fire until a working party was formed to knock down the shiggy. Mayoral F suggested we move the blazing firepit up the muddy hill and out of the woods. uh….. no. I nominate him to do none of our thinking from now on.
the hare was called forth. the lord natty boh spaketh of the Hare through his religious advisor saying:
He might lead you in a holy prayer, because he’s an ordained preacher,
or buy your kids’ underwear, because he’s their creepy teacher.
He will hare for you if you act as his beer bitch,
or have sex with you but he’ll leave you with a painful itch.
these are facts about hisself that he wanted to share,
the barefoot running, honey-wine making, feather wearing reverend Running Bhare.
Then a bunch of the congregation got violated. Cops arrived in the parking lot and the more guilty of us considered running, or trying to douse the fire, or other ridiculous panicky things. but we played it cool and the cops drove on. the aforementioned episode featuring grand mattress was noted and there occured an instant naming. Dump n Scrunch.
thence to the on after, where Just Kristen, not to be outdone, set about making a name for herself and nearly did, got almost named Lady Is A Tramp. There is evidence. though OK personally if it were me instead of her in that picture groping Pump n Dump’s taters, i would have looked a little more more pleased with myself.
so another sunday perfectly wasted.
on on to 1194.