Hash Trash # 1064-66 Camping Weekend of Temptation
Date: August 15 – 17, 2008
Hares: Fossil & Back Seat Box
Trail(s): Three Days and Three Nights…where “naturists” meet the un-naturalists…in biblical proportions
…and on the FIRST DAY, before light turned into darkness, they came, and erected their poles. The chosen forty arrived at the garden of Avalon, awaiting the temptations that were promised. And when their cups runneth a mile, their enlightenment began. The anointed one (B4B), was rewarded a silver lined vessel for cuming first. Then the rest of the followers formed a circle to receive their penance, but there was much rejoicing. All those accused were forced to swallow but Spitz could not receive her drink being hindered by a sinister “safety-third” cuff, and so was charged with alcohol abuse for locking her keys in her vehicle. There was even more wastage from Parrot Head when he allowed spillage without even playing “tippy cup” but having “tipped” the table of filled vessels. Then when fire showed us the light, we all received our first supper after Pyro had slayed a dragon and cut it up into hamburgers and hotdogs. Then the followers were baptized by the naturists at their hot-tub of holy water, after a communion of wine and mixed drinks were consumed.Then, when everyone had finished their prayers for s*x and copulation, pandora’s box flew opened with avengence and a clap of thunder – when screams of marital blasphemy could be heard for miles – and for hours – and into the night. Until, Three-Holer could take it no longer and hoisted his poles and his lost erection across the burning bush for some peace and quiet
.…and so on the SECOND DAY, the followers were awakened by the voice of wrath, demanding all to seek redemption from their nightly sins. Sextion 8 had aroused all who could hear, except for Muffallata and NewsAt11, because they had “tipped their cups” too many times the night before. And then, when it was time, the followers boarded their private chariot for a 30 mile journey to meet Moses atop Mount Cacapon Those chosen to lose their balls were permitted to begin their 11 mile quest first, followed by the turkeys who only sought out a mere 8 mile trek, while the remaining blessed, set off to find Jesus in only 4 miles. When he couldn’t be found, and no one could walk on water, everyone returned for their atonement and condemnations from Slowman and all other accusers.
Then, the tired, the meek, and the restless, re-boarded their private chariot again, where upon the driver was overtaken by the devil herself, forcing him to loose control of his knob and causing much panic and pandemonium (but she wasn’t there!) by the followers who thought they might careen off their mounts and tip over into valley of death. Finally passing this test, the followers were served their last dinner, prepared by the goddess of talketh (Three Trick Pony) and goddess of cumeth (Amazon). Then all were summoned to the sermon at the fire — where AnnieCock presented his rap-scripture according to “rhyme” and reasons. There where additional confessions from NoNameN-yet who also led a chosen few to disrobe. Then, everyone was blessed and cleansed for the scheduled midnight sacrifice of clothing, where upon RunningBare realized (the next day) that his clothing had actually been sacrificed, leaving him “bare”, clueless, and keyless. Can anyone confess to this discretion?
…and then, on the THIRD DAY, everyone sold their souls to the devil so enjoy the forbidden fruit (apple shots) and to walk a cheesy trail of recovery, and circled up to reveal their final confessions:
1. Amelia Airhead confessed she got to “count” an Italian
2. Velvet confessed nothing to the all knowing
3. Three-Holer proved he WAS a Blackman from his waist down
4. EzLipps did not need to confess she was a "naturist" naturally
5. Three Trick confessed she had added a “fourth” trick
6. WM,FN admitted she was not violated all weekend long (who admits that?)
7. Muffallata confessed that Sextion 8 would have FIT if he took off his hat
8. Amazon confessed that she actually saw the “light” – somewhere between cuming and going
9. Captain Cupcake showed us that Sindy Laid WHoWho fits just right in his hands
10. Everyone proved they were tempted, blessed by the gods, and were all “naturists” practicing un-naturally.…AMEN…
Errors or omissions accepted (if it matters) — send an e-mail to: mailto: sallysportahoy@yahoo.com Scribe: Spitz.cum