Hash Trash # 1039 – Incest is Best
Hash # 1039: Incest is Best
Date: 9 March 2008
Hares: Spitz.cum, Swallows & Pyro
Trail: Incestuous bust
So there they were, Pyro left alone with 30 or so English-speaking hounds and no translation at chalk talk, while Spitz and Swallows incestuously dashed off to buy the shittiest beer they could find, get their nails done, relax in a hot-tub, clean their wounds, remove the river slime and sludge from their naked bodies, ALL before the pack became restless – too late.
With confused looks on their faces, the pack departed with the r*nners going that way and the w*lkers going the other – with a map. It was reported and denounced from the very beginning. The walkers, led by Fossil and his trusted steed, or rather bitch, found the end in record time. Damn. An early round of beer was served up to a fairly large group of newbies, visitors, and regulars. So they waited….
…the rest had followed the blaze of blue flour leading the pack through the beautiful Gorman Wildlife area and its many beaten pathways of fly-fisher trails. The hounds sniffed out flour that took them up, then down, between trees, along muddy river banks, skipping over creeks and trickles of water, across logs at river crossings, along boulders, on tree trunks and branches, until everyone finally reached the most incestuous crime of all – YBF – leading to an “imaged” end and BN. Not true, beer WAS near, just across the “other” way. So then it happened, the final travesty, crossing the frigid waters of the Middle Patuxent River, getting wet, and not cumming. Oh say it isn’t so. YUP.
There were words of outrage, words I cannot spell, there was abuse and humiliation, yet a moment of gallantry crossing the water. There were wet shoes, wetness everywhere, and there were hardy bellows of the thrill seeking pack as they slipped and slid their way up the final 10 feet to the “real” end. And then we all rejoiced. Sort of.
Multitudes of accusations were made and left behind in empty beer cans, everywhere. The hares were quilty and had transgressed every acceptable hare “don’t” known to the Hashdom — so they were violated, over and over again. And they loved it. And there was much rejoicing. Others recognized for their atrocities included the NorthCarolina-kilt-wearing visitor for FRB; Velvet Vulva and ECDC who came together the wrong way for DFL(s); Amazon.cum for not enough flour – ever; Just Michael for carrying ThreeTrickPony across the water, spread-eagle across his back (another naming archive – “just so long as it doesn’t have pony in it.”); the cute (according to Swallows) virgin baseball player, Just Lance, who committed incestuous acts with his visiting sponsor; and there was Gaelick and Just Mindy in their short-shorts with red knees and toes, shivering and shaking; and many many more but Spitz.cum swallowed way to much wicked beer and can’t remember much after that…until the large swell of hounds ended up at Michaels Pub, where ThreeTrickPony tried to seduce her with several martinis.
…then, Just Jennifer showed up followed by Too Sexy…did they cum together?
On-Sec Scribe: Spitz.cum