The trail notes for BAH3 1630:
What: A guaranteed wet, cold, and sloppy defiling of a virgin hare just so he and others can go to a party.
When: Pack away at 3 pee em sharp Sunday January 20, 2019.
Where: Nature Trail Parking at Piney Orchard – 8702 Natures Trail Ct, Odenton, MD 21113 located near the intersection of Piney Orchard Way Parkway and Sandy Walk Way.
Hares – Just “Chris” will be violated by Periodic Table Dancer, I’d Do’er, and Diddler on the Roof
Who: Those who watch NASCAR for the car crashes or who enjoy amateur midget porn. Also welcome are those who enjoy ankle deep, freezing mud and hanging out with the homeless in culverts. Trail is dog friendly, but does interact with muggles at times.
Why: I can’t be a 40yo virgin forever (even though I was on the party list!). I figured it would be easier to be broken in by 3 senior hares before the hare “party”.
On After – TBD
Trail Notes: Bring $6, lube, and be prepared for freezing rain. Runners ~4.5 and walkers 3.25
Just “Chris” – 813.917.1794
At the Titty bar. GPS, CTD, and AYC Haring.
WHERE: the parking lot of Fantasies Night Club
5520 Pennington Avenue, Baltimore, Md. (the same as last year)
WHY: because its a great excuse to keep the Christmas spirit alive before
the gloom and doom of the current administration
WHAT to give you ask. $25 max. Here are some memorable gifts from Elephants past
the box of VHS porn (w/a VHS player)(now its on a flash drive)
the “Dummies guide to Anal” so coveted by Little Flour
the statue of Jesus playing soccer with the little children
Evil Jesus’ 3 year old hashing shoes & by accident his brand new ones
the Home Depot gift card with $0 on it, Beer, Alcohol, Hashy Stuff
(I think you get the idea)
NOTE: Doorman says: “no kids, no animals.” Dress like a naughty elf in the “night club” (that means sexy,revealing, hot, tight, low cut- in other words like Bobbin on NYE)
RECAP: show up at 1:00 pm at Fantasies, bring a great present, dress like a slut inside, have a lot of fun & laughs. Oh yeah,
TRAIL: A to A, about 4ish miles for runners, 2ish for walkers,
mild-moderate shiggy, some avoidable water (depending on rain/snow)
THANKS- 1:00 pm (note the earlier start time)